a strange and beautiful contradiction
a strange and beautiful contradiction
This site is intended for wanderers and woolgatherers: people who are looking for a bit of space for reflection.
In my previous job, I had spent hours upon hours, days upon days sifting through media meant to provoke, manipulate, outrage, beguile and stimulate. Most journalists manage to develop some sort of immunity as spectators (and sometime participants) to this compulsory reality show. Though it might betray my own professional shortcomings, I’ll admit that I don’t have the right kind of constitution for it. To be sure, I did enjoy my work even if long-term exposure to political scandals, natural disasters, mass shootings, military aggression and all manner of front-page onslaught had made me allergic. The onset was so gradual I hardly even noticed until one day I found myself idly fantasizing about hell and all the flavors of eternal torment owed to certain public figures. Perhaps it is abnormal to exist in a constant state of heightened agitation.
When circumstances unrelated to work prompted me to hit pause, it was at first disquieting to be so unmoored. Without headlines and along with them that persistent sense of urgency to drive the day, life sagged into something shapeless. At the time, friends who know me well cautioned against giving in to my natural impulses— i.e., not to go full Hikikomori. If you can relate to this tendency toward avoidance, then I will tell you now that social isolation is not the answer. Nor is escapism (though if you’re going to do it, ASOIAF is a rich vein to mine).
A little bit of boredom could be a tonic, however.
I started to go places by foot or by bike. Wandering through run-of-the-mill neighborhoods, photographing rocks and trees, listening to water, befriending denizens furry and feathery— these long stretches of solitude had the unexpected effect of reconnecting me to a more solid and reassuring reality. My explorations don’t have much of a point beyond finding pleasant and undemanding places to serve as a backdrop for my thoughts (or music or audiobooks or podcasts). Any journey that involves trains is a plus. At times I will seek out an iconic tourist attraction or find myself having to crop out the occasional selfie-taker from a photo or two. However, I generally avoid those made-for-Instagram destinations that would inspire jealousy from followers. That’s beside the point, as we boring day-trippers crave no such attention.
I can bore just about anyone. It’s a gift.
